The Life

and I miss them…

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It’s a strange feeling to look back and see how far you’ve come in life.  Pictures will remind you of times that are older then you can even remember.    Stories told will transport you back to a place that seems like such a distant memory.  Even closing your eyes and listening to a song can make you feel like you are back in that place, in that time, with those people.

I am finding myself so nostalgic for the past lately.  I miss the carefree days.  I miss the freedom.  I miss my metabolism.  More and more lately I find that I am looking through old pictures or trying so hard to remember what a certain day felt like.  To even for a second be reminded of a moment 15 years ago.  And suddenly it hit me.  I don’t miss the past.  I don’t miss my youth.

I miss them.

You see, I met the loves of my life when I was only 11.   I don’t even know if I knew what was happening back then.  How important meeting them would be.  How meeting them would in fact change my entire life.

There are three of them.  And we are each so different that upon meeting us all individually you would never understand how our friendship is possible.  But it is.  For 19 years we have brought out the best, and sometimes the worst in each other.   Been there for every birthday, celebration, graduation, wedding and birth.

And I miss them.

Sure, I am acclimated to my “adult” life.  I got married.  I had babies.  I moved far away.  I made new friends.  Lots of new friends.  I am busy now.  Sometimes Mary Poppins busy and sometimes struggling to keep my head above water busy.  Time and distance have proven to be difficult obstacles.  Much like branches on a tree we have all grown to go our separate ways.  We all chose a different path.  It makes sense, you know.  We couldn’t hang out in the car at the drive in movies forever.  We followed our own hearts and paved our own ways for ourselves.

But they are my roots.

They are where I come from.  They know me better then I know myself.  They were there for every silly crush, failed test and broken heart. They knew me before I knew how to use a blow dryer.  And they loved me anyways.

And I miss them.

I know how lucky I am to have them.  All three of them.  True love in friendship doesn’t happen to everyone.  And not a day goes by that I am not grateful for them.  For the unconditional love.  The accept each other for who they are and love them anyways kind of love.  The understand each other’s faults and not hold it against them kind of love.  The feeling the same happiness when they are celebrating and hating the world with them when life is hard kind of love.  And life is hard.

And I miss them.

So I’ll look at some old pictures, watch some of the 300 hours of video footage we have taped over the years, dance to Britney Spears in my living room and transport myself back to my youth.  Back to when seeing them was a part of my daily routine.  When we didn’t have to schedule vacations and buy plane tickets to meet for a drink.  When we didn’t have any careers or school stopping us from meeting for a cup of coffee.  I will transport myself back there, even if only for an hour.

And then I will call them.  And tell them I love them.  And maybe look up cheap plane tickets and fantasize about a girls weekend.  Start a never ending group text that will end up with someone sending incriminating photos of themselves.  Because that’s what we do.  That’s who we are.   And I live for that.

They are my people.

And I miss them.

XO Danielle

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