The Life

I’m just going to come out and say it.

I am training for my first half marathon.

::PAUSE::

::WAIT FOR LAUGHTER::

Are you all finished?

Ok.  I should start by saying I am being forced into this.  Semi-willingly.  I think it would be amazing to run a half marathon.  Or even run a mile.  It just feels so impossible.  I get out of breath running to the mailbox.  I think my body would only physically run if I was being chased by a monster, or if someone was dangling a slice of pepperoni pizza in front of me.

Today was day 1.

Assessment day.

I head out to the gym with Miss Mini in tow.  I go upstairs and of course it is PACKED.  I wanted a treadmill on the end.  Nope.  Dead center.  Sandwiched between a male Baywatch model and a pre-pubescent looking female college freshman.  I mean are 19 year old girls seriously that small??

My first thought was…Holy shit, my ass is going to jiggle.  It is fat, and it is going to jiggle with each single running step I take.  I am not doing this.  Nope.  No way.  No how.

But then I look 2 treadmills over.   There is a girl who easily weighs 180lbs.  And she is jogging.  For longer then 10 seconds.  And she is sweating.  And literally working her ass off.  And she is jiggling.  Everywhere.  And she clearly doesn’t give a shit.

So I ran.

Ass jiggling and all.

I did interval training for 2 miles.  Run 30 seconds, walk 30-60 seconds.  Depending on how I felt.  Sometimes I was able to push myself to run for 45 seconds.  Even 1 minutes a couple of times.  I listened to my body.  I pushed myself.  I walk/ran 14 min/miles.  Could have been better.  Could have been worse.  I did it.  I pushed myself to go to the gym and try.  After already working out at home during Mini’s nap.  After working a full day at my job.  After doing laundry and vacuuming.  I did it.

And I’m proud.

I don’t know if I actually will be able to run a half marathon.  But I’m sure going to try.

Now tell me.  Who wants to run ahead of me and dangle the pizza…???

You Might Also Like

6 Comments

  • Reply
    Shannon
    June 10, 2013 at 9:29 pm

    You are hilarious, Danielle!! You really should be writing full time! 🙂 I’ve read a few of your entries and they always make me smile.

    • Reply
      Minismama
      June 10, 2013 at 11:28 pm

      You are so sweet! Glad I make you smile 🙂 See ya at the finish line!

  • Reply
    Jessica Heller
    June 11, 2013 at 6:13 am

    You are so relatable and really add some laughter into it all! I’m looking forward to reading more of your blog about running as well as your other postings!

    • Reply
      Minismama
      June 11, 2013 at 12:41 pm

      Thanks Jessica! 🙂

  • Reply
    Samantha
    January 27, 2014 at 6:32 pm

    I will dangle your pizza…moms need to stick together and I know how it is to work a full day out of the house, half a day IN the house and still keep my two beautiful children alive, and (somewhat) well-adjusted!

    • Reply
      Minismama
      January 27, 2014 at 8:29 pm

      Thank you! If you ever need a pizza dangler — just ask!

    Leave a Reply to Samantha Cancel Reply